This morning, I wrote LET IT GO on my hand in thick black ink. I am 33, and I can’t believe I still have do this. Driving to coffee, the sky rips itself open, cries all over the place. The cars slow and linger in it, headlights glow and steam. When I finally arrive, the barista sees the writing on my hand and says nothing. But she gives me my change with two palms: one reaching toward me from above, the other holding me from below. I can’t write poems about you. It is impossible. A friend said when she writes, her husband is a large grizzly bear, her children are five tiny hearts in five lanterns, and she is the little girl hiding a mermaid, or the wife of a dog trained to walk on his back legs, or the boy who orders a woman’s heart for dinner and gets it. You don’t always have to be so literal, she says. That’s why it’s poetry. But I can’t help it. I am always me. My hand is always my hand. The black letters tell the story of my whole life to anyone who wants to read it: LET IT GO. This morning, the it was you.
“I’d cut my soul into a million different pieces just to form a constellation to light your way home. I’d write love poems to the parts of yourself you can’t stand. I’d stand in the shadows of your heart and tell you I’m not afraid of your dark.”—Andrea Gibson (via freyjageist)
“And I can’t
but to run my fingers
down your spine
like you are my
book. But I still
cannot read you,
your own language.
Your pages are
tired and torn,
but I want you,
I want it all.”—Michelle K., (via confusingmisery)
“If he’s not calling you, it’s because you are not on his mind. If he creates expectations for you, and then doesn’t follow through on little things, he will do same for big things. Be aware of this and realize that he’s okay with disappointing you. Don’t be with someone who doesn’t do what they say they’re going to do. If he’s choosing not to make a simple effort that would put you at ease and bring harmony to a recurring fight, then he doesn’t respect your feelings and needs. ‘Busy’ is another word for ‘ass-hole’. ‘Ass-hole’ is another word for the guy you’re dating. You deserve a fucking phone call.”—Greg Behrendt (via amandaonwriting)
“You tried to change didn’t you?
closed your mouth more
tried to be softer
less volatile, less awake
but even when sleeping you could feel
him travelling away from you in his dreams
so what did you want to do, love
split his head open?
you can’t make homes out of human beings
someone should have already told you that
and if he wants to leave
then let him leave
you are terrifying
and strange and beautiful
something not everyone knows how to love.”—Warsan Shire , “For Women Who Are Difficult to Love” (via cultivate-solitude)
“He may still love you. He probably does. He probably doesn’t know what he wants. He probably still thinks about you all the time. But that isn’t what matters. What matters is what he’s doing about it, and what he’s doing about it is nothing. And if he’s doing nothing, you most certainly shouldn’t do anything. You need someone who goes out of their way to make it obvious that they want you in their life.”—(via cultivate-solitude)
“I don’t really want to become normal, average, standard. I want merely to gain in strength, in the courage to live out my life more fully, enjoy more, experience more. I want to develop even more original and more unconventional traits.”— Anaïs Nin, The Diary of Anaïs Nin, Vol. 1: 1931-1934 (via larmoyante)